Dealing with sexual extortion

Sexual extortion or ‘sextortion’ is a form of blackmail where someone threatens to share a nude or sexual image or video of you unless you give in to their demands. If this happens to you, you’re not alone – there’s help available.

Remember, it’s not your fault, even if you shared the intimate content with the blackmailer in the first place – anyone can experience sextortion.

Blackmailers usually give up when they realise you won’t pay. But if they do share your intimate image or video online, you can report it to eSafety and we will help get it removed.

On this page: 

• What are the warning signs?
• How you can be blackmailed
• What should I do if I’m being blackmailed?
• What if I’ve already paid the blackmailer?
• Michael’s story
• More information

Blackmailers often target people through online dating sites, social media, messaging services and gaming apps.

They commonly pretend to be an attractive person looking for sex, then trick you into sending nudes or sexual images or videos, or record you during a live chat with them.

Once they have an intimate image or video of you, they threaten to share it with your family, friends or co-workers unless you give them what they want. 

These are things to look out for:

• Something does not add up. Their online profile doesn’t match what you see and hear when you talk or chat with them. 
• It happens too fast. They express strong emotions for you almost straight away, and quickly tempt you across to a more private channel, suggesting you get nude or sexual in a video call. 
• They make excuses. They say their webcam is not working and instead they send a nude photo which they claim is of them. 
• They pile on the pressure. They keep asking you to be sexual and to send nudes with your face in the shot. 
• They use ‘bombing’ as a tactic to make it look like they are a mutual friend. They try to friend or follow as many people from your school, sports team, university or community to make you believe they are a ‘real’ person you haven’t met before.

Remember, it’s always OK to say no to sending nudes or getting sexual online.  

Don’t pay the blackmailer or give them more money or intimate content. If you have already paid them by money transfer, you may be able to cancel it.

Before you do anything else, reach out for support. Being blackmailed over your intimate images or videos can be stressful and upsetting. You don’t have to cope on your own. It’s a good idea to tell a friend, family member, co-worker or someone else you trust, so they can help you deal with the situation. Or you can contact a confidential counselling and support service.

Then follow these steps…

1. Collect evidence

Save a record of:

• all contact from the blackmailer, particularly their demands and threats
• how they contacted you – for example, the Facebook URL (web address) where the blackmailer sent you a threat or their usernames on Snapchat, Instagram and any other online platforms
• when they contacted you, including dates and times
• details about the blackmailer – for example, their bank account or phone number
• any reports you have made about the issue to any online platforms or to police. 

Taking screenshots or screen recordings, or photos of your screen with another device, is a quick and easy way to collect evidence. Include the threatening messages and blackmailer’s profile. Don’t send your images or videos to any other services.

Find out how to collect evidence, including how to take screenshots on a Mac, Windows PC, Apple devices or Android devices.

2. Report sexual extortion

• If you’re under 18, the best way to get help is to report it to the Australian Centre to Counter Child Exploitation (ACCCE).  
• If you’re 18 years or older, report it to any platforms or services where the blackmailer contacted you. If your intimate image or video is shared, you can report it to eSafety.

3. Stop further contact, tighten security and prevent sharing

• After you have collected evidence, use in-app functions or your device settings to block the blackmailer and ask your friends to do the same. 
• You can also temporarily deactivate your accounts to prevent the blackmailer harassing you (but don’t delete the accounts, as you may lose evidence that way). 
• Review the privacy and security settings of your accounts to limit who can contact you. If you’ve been scammed, change the passwords for your social media and other online accounts. For more information about how to adjust settings on different apps, games, websites and online platforms and services, see The eSafety Guide. 
• If someone claims to have hacked or accessed any of your accounts, find out how to protect your personally identifiable information.

4. Get more help

What you’re going through is not easy. Even when it’s over you may need more support. 

• Try contacting an expert counselling and support service, especially if you’re feeling anxious or depressed. 
• Read our advice on how to manage the impacts of image-based abuse, including tips for taking care of your wellbeing.
• Scamwatch also has useful information about threats and extortion scams and false hacking claims.

If you transferred money from a bank account, contact your bank to see if they can help.

If you have paid by a money transfer, you may be able to cancel it if you act quickly.

These links provide information on how to cancel money transfers for international sites commonly used by blackmailers. 

• Cash App
• MoneyGram (if you live in Australia, call 1800 049 087 immediately)
• PayPal
• Remitly
• Venmo
• Western Union
• WorldRemit
• Zelle

This page offers advice for general audiences. You can find more information in our image-based abuse section, as well as tailored advice about sexual extortion in the Young People, and First Nations sections of the website.

You can also read more information in eSafety’s position statement about sexual extortion, and our research papers about sexual extortion of adolescents and image-based abuse.