Spotting the warning signs of tech-based coercive control
It isn’t always easy to tell when a romantic relationship is becoming controlling.
It often only becomes clear over time when lots of individual actions by the abuser build up into a wider, more obvious pattern of controlling behaviour. This is called coercive control.
When digital technologies are used as part of coercive control, it is called tech-based coercive control or technology-facilitated coercive control.
This is a serious form of abuse that can undermine a person’s confidence, freedom and independence – but it is not widely understood.
To help more Australians identify red flags or warning signs that a partner might be using technology as part of a broader pattern of coercive control, eSafety has launched a new social media campaign called ‘Love is’ – to reinforce what love isn’t.
Building on the success of our 2023 ‘Love is’ campaign, eSafety has partnered with the Telco Together Foundation to raise awareness of tech-based coercive control.
Throughout 16 Days of Activism against Gender-based Violence (25 November to 10 December, 2024), Telstra, Optus, TPG Telecom, Vocus, Aussie Broadband, Superloop, Uniti Group, Tangerine Telecom and Indara will be taking the message of ‘Love is’ to employees and customers right across Australia.
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[A series of definitions in the style of a dictionary entry appear] |
love: - to feel deep affection for someone - supporting your ambition to win the local karaoke cup |
love isn't: - to use tech to coerce or control someone - constantly messaging you [text messages appear] - Where are you? - What are you doing? - Who are you with? |
love: - to feel deep affection for someone - giving you space to vent about your boss... again |
love isn't: - to use tech to coerce or control someone - forcing you to share your location data, so they can track where you are |
love: - to feel deep affection for someone - thinking your snort-laugh is the best sound ever |
love isn't: - to use tech to coerce or control someone - telling you what selfies you can and can't post on social media [text messages appear] - I told you not to post that - You look awful - Take it down - I said no |
love: - to feel deep affection for someone - celebrating your successes tiny, big and small |
love isn't: - to use tech to coerce or control someone - getting jealous and possessive when you add new friends online [text messages appear] - Why did you add them? - Who are they? - How do you know them? |
love: - to feel deep affection for someone - always having a shoulder to ugly-cry on |
love isn't: - to use tech to coerce or control someone - getting angry when you don't want to send them nudes [text messages appear] - But you owe me - Why not? - Don't you love me? |
Video: Love is... to feel deep affection for someone
How can I get involved?
Build awareness of tech-based coercive control
To help us educate more Australians, you can join the conversation with eSafety on Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn and X (formerly Twitter) and share our campaign posts.
Learn more about tech-based coercive control
We have information to help you, your family and friends better understand this abusive behaviour:
Last updated: 21/11/2024
